My fresh meat experience so far...

To borrow a quote from a fellow freshie; "Roller derby is the most challenging sport I've ever been a part of, physically and mentally." It's been a long journey in the 2011 Greensboro Roller Derby fresh meat class. In many ways, it doesn't seem long enough. We are roughly six weeks away from our assessments and I can tell you now, I'm worried. I know I'm not ready and I don't know what it's going to take to get there but I'll keep pushing. Let me begin at the....beginning.

In January, I decided to take the leap and tryout for the Greensboro Roller Derby fresh meat class. I didn't know what to expect. Was I going to be too unskilled as a skater? Was I tough enough? Would these people be friendly and helpful or look at me like "what the hell is this girl doing here?" What I found was a great group of friendly people who were just as excited as me for us to be there. That sealed the deal. I went to all three tryout dates and began practicing as a freshie. I can't believe how far I've come over these past few months. I can do so much more than I thought I ever could do on roller skates. You see, I never enjoyed skating as a kid. In fact, I avoided it if I could. The only real memory I have of it was when I was little and my parents tried to take me. They held on to both of my hands and all I remember was my sheer terror as my feet moved in directions beyond my control. Part of this journey has been about conquering a fear and challenging myself to be better at something I was awful at. I still have plateaus to cross and mental blocks to conquer but I keep trying. I have days where my head just isn't in it, no matter how much my heart is. It's normal for everyone in this sport, though, to deal with failing confidence. Everyone gets mad and thinks "That's it! I'm done!" When you get past those road blocks, however, you feel amazing and you fall in love with it all over again.

The physical aspect has been a challenge, too. Derby demands you to squat until you think your legs can't take it and then squat more after that. You have to work outside of skating, too. Doing yoga, going to the gym, or running are all beneficial to a derby skater. For the first time in my life, I feel like I'm in pretty good shape. Still, I feel like I need to be in better shape to last out on the track. Two minutes of skating may not sound like a long time but when you're speeding up, slowing down, manuvering, looking for opposing players, and blocking, you are amazed at just how tired you can be after that. Or try skating as fast as you can for 5 minutes straight, like we'll have to do for part of our assessments. Then imagine doing the equivalent of lunges and squats for 5 minutes while skating, which we do when practicing our falls. Yeah, endurance is a necessity to make it in this sport, along with muscle strength, balance, and mental focus. You see derby isn't just a bunch of girls on skates, going around a track, hitting each other. It's a sport, it involves strategy and physical ability. However, it's a sport that many people never in their lives thought they could do, until they tried.

The greatest part of this experience so far isn't just about accomplishing personal goals but it's been getting to know the amazing people I'm on this journey with. Our vet trainers, coaches, and vet skaters have all been so great. They encourage us, include us and are all around fantastic people. Our fresh meat group has become an awesome support unit. We encourage each other, help each other, and believe in one another. I know if I don't pass assessments this time around, I'll be back. I can't stop now.

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, I know....

So I've been sucking on the whole updating the blog thing. A lot has gone on my life but I'm going to make up for it....hopefully.

A new year is here and I've decided that I'm going to really try and accomplish things I may have been previously too scared to do. The really silly thing about it is, these are things I really want to do. Getting in shape isn't something I'm afraid to do as much as it is something I get lazy on and don't do. However, since starting derby, I have lost some weight and gained some muscle. I don't like going to a gym, I will if I have to, but I'd rather do something fun and the byproduct of that is you get in shape. Derby is perfect for that. I also mix in some running, cycling, and free weights stuff to change it up a bit. What I also hope to get from roller derby is confidence. I want to not worry about what people think if I go to an open mic night at a coffee house with my guitar and sing one of my songs. I want have the guts to send in my writing to places and not worry about being rejected.

As for writing, I've got about three different ideas going on at once. I need to pick just one and work on it, consistently. I would love to be published but I don't have the luxury of hiring an agent to send my work into a major publishing company and most, if not all, do not accept unsolicited work. So I have to look for smaller places, which isn't necessarily bad.

I'm not getting younger and I don't feel old but I guess what I feel is that I'm at a crossroads. I never set out with a plan for my life. I think I have always believed that the path will find me somehow. It will require work and I don't mind that at all, I guess I just wonder if there's more I could be doing.

My favorite month

The great thing about October is that it ends with one of my favorite holidays. It's Logan's first Halloween and she's going as a ladybug. Unfortunately, I haven't done as much decorating as I would've liked. I enjoy getting creative but I just haven't had any time this year it seems. Next year, I have vowed to do better.

Whenever October comes around, I immediately feel the need for a trip up to the mountains. In fact, my husband asked me to marry him while we were in the mountains in October. One of my favorite places, one I've visited since I was young, is the Peaks of Otter. It had been a few years since I've been up there and I really wanted to take Logan up there. There's this great lodge that we normally eat dinner after a day of driving on the parkway and some light hiking. I'll get to that in a bit.

My parents decided they wanted to join us, so they picked us up on Saturday the 16th and we headed up 52 until we hit the parkway. It was a nice drive and we drove past a lot of produce stands as we got into Virginia. One of my missions was to get some apples and a pumpkin but that didn't end up happening. There were plenty of places to stop along the way and I would love to do it next time we drive up that way. The leaves along the parkway were pretty but despite what the weather guys were saying, I think they were past peak. We passed some pumpkin patches and beautiful homes. Around lunch time we stopped for a picnic at a scenic overlook that was supposed to "overlook" Pilot Mountain. Unfortunately, the trees had grown up so much you couldn't see much of anything. Groundhog Mountain was just up the road and little did we know, there were a bunch of picnic tables. Next time we'll stop there.



We also planned on stopping at Mabry Mill but it was packed. I guess everyone else decided to take advantage of the beautiful day and head up there. So, we passed up the photo op at the mill and continued down the parkway. We stopped at another overlook that had a trail you could hike down to the Roanoke river. We didn't go down the trail but we walked around a little bit before we continued on our way to Peaks of Otter. When we got there it was around 4:30 and people were already getting in line for dinner which began seating at 5pm. We walked around the large pond that sits behind the lodge, checked out the fish and the beautiful view of the mountain. Logan was entertained by a couple of little boys, much to her daddy's dismay. Quite a few people were out enjoying the view or picnicing by the water. It was pretty chilly with the wind whipping through, though. We had to buy Logan some ear warmers, which she kept on for a little bit, then proceeded to remove it like she does with all of her hats. After milling around for a bit, we made our way back to the Lodge to get a seat for dinner.



We look forward to dinner there because it's always so good. This time, however, it left a little to be desired. First, the service was pretty slow. It took a good while for my mom to get her wine, my dad never got his water and we didn't get our bread until we asked for some. I order something new they were offering that I was pretty excited about. It was a sesame tofu stir fry with veggies and rice. Unfortunately, the veggies tasted like the frozen Asian style vegetables you get at the grocery store. It wasn't horrible but it wasn't worth the amount they charged for it. Everyone else seemed to enjoy their meal but felt the service left something to be desired. Logan enjoyed her mashed potatoes, fried apples and bread. I guess management or whoever runs the kitchen changed. Either way, we decided to check out some other places to eat next time we go up there.



All in all it was a wonderful day and I can't wait to make it a yearly adventure with Logan. It really feels like fall when you're enjoying the beautiful colors of the leaves on the Blueridge Parkway.

I'm never joining a gym again...this time I mean it.

I'm all about having a healthy lifestyle with diet and exercise. Even though, the latter is not my most favorite thing but I still do it. However, since joining the gym-that-shall-not-be-named(hint: it rhymes with the Rush), I have acquired a bad taste in my mouth.

When I first joined, it looked like it would be fun and different from other gyms. They had a pool, rock climbing wall, simulated boxing ring, a separate women's gym and a basketball court. It looked like it could be fun because I'm one of those people who likes to get their exercise by doing things that don't seem like exercise. The getting in shape part is just an added bonus. I went pretty regularly, even tried out a trainer for a while. Then I got pregnant and I went less and less. I did more walking in the neighborhood during that time. Now, they offered the option of deferring your payments, for instances like pregnancy, while you weren't able to workout. Then I decided to quit work to be a stay-at-home mommy. Well, $50 a month wasn't something I wanted to pay while we were relying on one income. So I called them up to see if I could cancel the membership and pay an early termination fee or whatever. Well, I was informed much to my astonishment that I would have to pay the rest of what I owed for the remaining 3 years of the contract or show proof that I either a.) moved b.) had a doctor's note that I was disabled and couldn't work out or c.) was active military and was being sent out of the country. Really?! So, I guess if you were laid off or even dead you are SOL in getting out of the contract. I guess they'd just tell you "sorry" if you'd been laid off but you still gotta pay. That also goes for the surviving members of a family when they let them know the gym member is no longer with us. What a crock!

So, reluctantly, I just downgraded my membership. But guess what? It was like re-enrolling so I had to pay another deposit and basically sign up again for two years. Freaking A! Now, if that isn't enough, they draft my checking account for the fee. That was going along fine for a couple of months, then all of the sudden I get a letter saying I owe them double the amount I pay a month because they weren't able to draft my account. Uhhh, okaaay. I call them, they have no idea why there was a problem but wanted to say it was our fault and we still have to pay the fee. No, I'm sorry I don't. I gave you the account number and you drafted it for a few months with no problems AND there was money in the account so it must be something on your end, slick. Gotta love that customer service. They waived the fee after some convincing and things went back to normal. Then this week I see a charge come out of my account for a different amount and on a different date than the fee normally drafts. So I call and find out it's an enhancement fee that comes out every year so they can upgrade their equipment. Well what the frick are the membership dues for?!

To say they've soured my gym membership experience would be an understatement. However, I want to thank them for making me see the error of my ways. I will reluctantly go to your gym while I still pay you money but when I'm done, it's all about jogging and working on the Wii Fit.

Balloons are evil

What happens when you have a rainy day at the beach? You blog about some complete randomness, if you’re me.

We went to watch the Cape Fear Roller Girls bout in Wilmington on Saturday the 24th. I’ll write more about that later but I will say this; they are awesome and they won. The crowd really gets into it in Wilmington. I’m talking about air horns, loud music, signs, etc. Logan came with us of course and she didn’t seem to mind the all the noise. We did make her some make-shift ear plugs, though. We were impressed that it didn’t upset her and it got me thinking about how I hated loud noises when I was little. One that particularly disturbed me was balloons. Yes, like the way kids are scared of clowns (someone believed to bring joy); I was scared of the balloon.

Who thought it was a good idea to give kids these nerve-racking, ear blasting devices at birthday parties? All they were going to do with them is stomp on them, twist them or squeeze them until they pop. Of course, you could always use them as an air-filled baton to beat someone over the head repeatedly. I could never totally relax at a party where balloons were present. I was always keeping an eye on them, like you would a shady looking person you walk by in a dim lit area. I would always expect any kid that came near one was going to pop it and even though I would watch them, the noise still startled me.

I didn’t even trust them in my own possession. I would always think they would find their way to the ceiling and pop themselves on one those textured bumps. Or just pop on their own for no reason at all. I only felt relief when they would start to lose air and sink closer to the floor. Not only the popping could be offensive but the squeaking when you rubbed your hands across it or the shrill sound when you slowly let the air out. Then what about the chalky, nasty tasting residue they leave on your lips after you blow them up. It probably will be something shown to cause cancer in the future.

Now whenever I see a balloon floating up into the air, I am relieved because that balloon can never be popped by child and wreak havoc on the nerves of others like me.

My 30th Birthday Present to Myself

As I approach my last few weeks of being a 20 something, I feel more relaxed than I thought. I'm not really worried about turning 30. I've heard mixed reviews of the milestone; some saying it was horrible others saying it was great. I think for me, or at least I hope, it will be a time where I really get to know myself and be comfortable with myself.



Which brings me to my birthday present to myself. I've decided I am going to celebrate by going to the beach for two weeks. I LOVE the beach, it's like instant zanax. There are no worries, I can relax by the pool or beach and for a little while life is at zero stress level. It can be a diet buster though, because the main thing you want to do is eat and snack and then eat some more. At least that's the way I feel! Then when it's time to go back home it always seems like the trip was never long enough, even if I've been down there for a week. I've never been for two weeks so we'll see if I still feel that way at the end.



We were there at the end of June for my dad's birthday. Logan's first real time in the pool was then and while she wasn't sure about it at first she eventually decided she was okay with it. Her daddy had the magic touch. If anyone else took her in the pool, she would start to cry. When Brian took her in she started a little bit but then she would stop and let him twirl her around. She even started to fall asleep! She'll get plenty of pool time this vacation along with some beach time(we'll see how she does with that). We're also taking Darby. If any of you that read this remember, he was a little nervous when we took him to Asheville. We were only there for a few days so he'll have some more time to get adjusted. I'm eager to see how he responds to the beach and ocean!




I'm so excited to be able to do this! I'm going to take a lot of pictures and I'm going to try out my camera Brian gave me a couple of Christmases ago that I have yet to use. It takes really cool looking pictures and requires special film. I'll probably update the blog from there, if I get motivated enough. ;-)

Carolina Roller Girls Bouts-Dorton Arena 6/12/10

It's been 5 months since I began this journey into the roller derby world. I've learned so much in a short amount of time. My skating has improved quite a bit but I know I can be so much better. I've gone to a couple of bouts in the past few months also. Since I've never seen a bout they've been an opportunity to learn more about the sport. The skill level with every bout has improved and I've learned something different from each one.

This past weekend we drove down to Raleigh to check out the Carolina Roller Girls' two bouts. Brian and I picked up my friend who lives in the area and we headed to Dorton. The first bout was between the Carolina Bootleggers and the Columbia Quad Squad. Unfortunately, they lost but it was a good bout. Both teams played hard. The next bout was between the Carolina All-Stars and Dutchland All Stars, a team from Pennsylvania. This bout was probably the fastest one I've seen yet and showed some different skills and strategies I've never seen. I was so glad I got to watch these teams in action, they were awesome. My friend even got into it after I explained to him how the bouts are played and the rules. The Carolina All-Stars pulled off the win, too!

Seeing the bouts only makes me more inspired to go for it. These girls have fun out there, even though they're serious about winning. Hopefully, I'll get to experience it firsthand in the near future.